Hey y’all!
Please forgive me for the delayed post! I’ve been out of town this
past week and I’m working to get caught up on everything. I just
got back from Arkansas where I attended my baby
brother’s high school graduation. I can tell you that this is
the first time in a while that I wasn’t quite ready to head back to San
Diego. At last, it doesn’t hurt to go back (and you’ll soon see why).
Arkansas is home and always will be. It’s quite a humbling feeling to
know that God would allow such healing in my heart so that I can go home to
enjoy my family, friends and all my sweet little blessings back there.
So back to the other Arkansas trip home! That
trip was not the glorious adventure that I had hoped. In fact, it was one
of the most painful moments of my life. A girl whose heart thought that love
could stand against anything in the world was shattered into pieces. And
girlfriends, let me tell you something, in the next few lines of this
story I pray that I’m careful not to let the enemy get an ounce of
glory for the hurt, pain, and devastation the betrayal of divorced caused. Yes,
I will acknowledge the real pain and hurt, but I’ll also thank the good Lord
for being so much bigger than my circumstances.
When I drove to Arkansas, I hadn’t a clue why my husband wanted a
divorce. I knew that his actions and decisions in the past week seemed a
bit off, but I couldn’t understand what was going on and I wasn’t sure why or
what caused the abrupt change. Before I left to make the 1700 mile drive, my
sweet roommate prayed for me and asked God to shine light into the darkness of
the unknown. Little did we know that God would powerfully and truthfully answer
that prayer, and that He would continue to do so in the years to come.
As I searched for answers, I found that the truth was being revealed
to me slowly, in bits and pieces. And thank heavens it was.
Because I’m not sure I would have survived as gracefully as I did otherwise!
God answered many of my prayers, not all of them, but many of them.
Looking back, I’m thankful there were a few He decided not to answer my
way. I’m positive that God knew better … that I didn’t need
a big billboard or pink motorcycle in my name! (More on that later.) God
revealed answers to my prayers through phone records, a professional counselor
that-just-so-happened to return a phone call six weeks later, on the
day the divorce petition was filed. God showed me truth through the
deceit, wisdom beyond my years, and family and friends who had my best
interests at heart. Even at that point, I wasn’t quite sure what was
going on. But I did have a much better idea of it.
Arkansas
Trip: Part 2 is soon to follow. I didn’t want to make this post too long, so
please expect to see the rest in the next few days.
Much love,
Jes
“To
God belongs wisdom and power; counsel and understanding are His. He reveals the
deep things of the darkness and bring utter darkness into the light.” Job 12:
13, 22
